Maybe I’m Amazed …

“C’mon, Emily. Ya gotta do it. It’s been twelve days for crying out loud.”

The Emilymurphy shook her head as she had for each and every one of those twelve days. As the administrator of the Gee-Yes-Aye Swamp Dino Work Force, it was her duty to give the go-ahead, allowing the new leader to access all the dino necessities before moving into the Oval Dwelling in two months.

That new leader would be the Joebiden, who was standing before her.

“Here’s the deal, Emily. If you recognize me as your leader we can get this show on the road and I can begin helping dinos of all stripes.”

She frowned. The pressure on her was unbearable. The T-Rump had told her he would make her life a living hell if she so much as lifted a finger for the Joebiden. She hadn’t signed up for this. She brightened. That was it. She’d find a new job. She knew the T-Rump had threatened to run any dino out of the jungle if he caught them looking for a new job. No, instead they had to plan events for months down the road that weren’t even going to  happen.

“Emily, speak to me. Dinos are dying. I can help them. My whole team wants to help them. It’s up to you, Emily.”

She bit her lip. She was getting a migraine. Dino migraines were extra bad because their brains were smaller. Less space, more intense. No room for guilt. Only pain.

“Why are you doing this, Emily? The past four transitions have gone fine. Face it. The T-Rump lost. It’s time to hit the road, Jack. Not you, I mean the T-Rump. Sure, he can stay for another couple of months. You know what I mean.”

She knew the T-Rump wanted to stay in the Oval Dwelling forever. Would he ask her to hold out for an end to term limits? It would make her job easier. Her stomach growled. It was after lunch and she hadn’t eaten yet. She looked the dino leader-elect up and down. He was skinny, but there was still meat on the bone. Two burly dinos lurked in the background. Damn his security detail. 

“Emily, I’ll stand her all day if I have to. You know why? Because all I can otherwise do is meet with dinos who aren’t in the right position, talk about anything except the things I want to talk about and generally keep losing valuable time I need to get this Dino Nation back up and running by the time I move into the Oval Dwelling. It’s called a transition, Emily. Not cool-your-heels-while-I-sit-on-my-butt.

Her face flushed. Oh, he was asking for it. But she wouldn’t say a word. No way. If she opened her mouth she had no idea what she would even say, she’d be so embarrassed she’d burst into tears and it would get back to the T-Rump that she was weak and … 

“Emily, I took the liberty of bringing an old friend with me.”

Uh-oh, what was he up to now? Was this some kind of trick? He smiled that gracious, exuberant 78-year-old Joebiden grin at her.

“I’d like you to meet my good buddy …”

Out of the bushes stepped the Paulmccartney.

The Emilymurphy’s heart skipped a beat. And two. And three. 

Maybe I’m amazed at the way he deludes his mind

And maybe I’m afraid of a way he won’t lose 

Maybe I’m amazed at they way he turns things on a dime

He has us on the line

Maybe I’m amazed at the harm he really could do 

Maybe Lindsey Graham, maybe he’s the biggest fan 

Who’s in Cruz and Pompeo’s ring

They’ve fallen under his dark command

Maybe that’s the plan

And maybe he’s the only liar who leaves them lingering 

Maybe sow the bitterness, fire-fanned

Maybe that’s the plan, maybe he has more to ban 

Who refuse to soothe his ego

That is his only true demand 

Maybe that’s the plan

And maybe he’s one who’d lay waste to democracy

Maybe we need to all join hand-in-hand

Maybe I’m amazed at the way my questions come to mind

Maybe I’m amazed at the urgency too

Maybe I’m amazed at the way he won’t sing his swan song

We’ve waited oh-so long

Maybe I’m amazed at the way his power grew 


You can hear the musical version of today’s post and previous T-Rump Digs at my podcast site at Podbean. Two new T-Rump tracks every Saturday. Enjoy!

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