The Igorfruman looked outside his cave and sighed. He was under cave arrest. His wife had left him the week before, leaving him with their three children in this dank 200-square foot cave. He couldn’t even take his kids to school. He worried about having to home-school them. If he taught them, would that necessarily lead them to a life of crime?
He kicked a stone in frustration. That damn Levparnas. Oh, sure, they’d once been good buddies. He’d introduced Lev to all his Ukraine Plain contacts who then immediately fell in line when the Rudygiuliani told them that Lev was working on behalf of the Tyrumposaurus himself. Part of the T-Rump team. Part of the cult.
Everything was sailing along until he and Lev were busted for bringing moolah-moolah leaves into the Milkanhoney Preservation and spreading them amongst eager Grandoldparty dinos. Dinos who even more eagerly gave the moolah-moolah back after he and Lev were popped.
But then the Levparnas had done something strange. He decided to talk. No sane dino with Russodino ties ever talked. It was a surefire recipe for extinction. Except history would be recorded differently. The Levparnas spoke with the trail-blazing Mediacircustops dino, the Rachelmaddow, and became an overnight sensation. So much so that Grandoldparty dinos were quaking in their footsteps. It was Levparnas this, Levparnas that. They were even singing songs about him now. Well, one song anyway. But they sung it a lot. Every hour on the hour, some new hip, young group of dinos would saunter past his cave, wailing away. This of course made it rather difficult to get the song out of his mind.
He heard footsteps coming down the path. Yep. Top of the hour. More Levparnas. Look out.
The power of Lev is a bombshell thing
Lev Parnas secrets to expose the king
Make them squawk, make their heartbeats rev
Send them all reeling, that’s the power of Lev
The Ukraine scandal, spillin’ the beans
Now we know who’s on the B-L-T team
Yovanovitch, you see, was followed that night
Power of Lev, it brings the truth to light
Poor Zelensky, T-Rump’s game
Pompeo, Pence, Barr; they all share the blame
It’s wrong, it’s corrupt, Lev knows it’s showtime
Comin’ clean just saved his life
That’s the power of Lev
That’s the power of Lev
First time Pence felt it, mother got so mad
Pompeo felt it, he’ll lose all he had
But we’re all so glad for what Lev found
That’s the power that brings T-Rump down
Poor Zelensky, T-Rump’s game
Pompeo, Pence, Barr; they all share the blame
It’s wrong, it’s corrupt, Lev knows it’s showtime
Comin’ clean just saved his life
We all want a trial that’s fair
But Mitch doesn’t care
So he can only spew
Every word so untrue
Then with a little help from Kiev
You feel the power of Lev
You feel the power of Lev
Can you feel it?
Hmm-Hmm
Poor Zelensky, T-Rump’s game
Pompeo, Pence, Barr; they all share the blame
Which big pig will be the first to squeal?
And Bolton, what will he reveal?
You feel the power, just feel the power of Lev
That’s the power, that’s the power of Lev
You feel the power of Lev
You feel the power of Lev
Feel the power of Lev
………………………………
You can hear the musical version of today’s post and previous T-Rump Digs at my podcast site at Podbean. Two new T-Rump tracks every Saturday. Enjoy!
David Belisle 