Stayin’ Home …

It was a three-day trek that came off as more of a scamper. The Davidbelisaurus and the Mariabelisaurus scampered north from Cactazona through Keno-Reno, Utah-whut-utah, Idaholindaspud and Hannah-Montana to finally arrive home where the Albertasaurae roam and the deer and the antelope are basically nervous wrecks.

These were dangerous times. Being a dinosaur had its drawbacks. There was always a hungry Stegosaurus around the next corner looking for some fast food take-out-your-tonsils. Add to that a new invisible enemy, a silent killer … the Coronavirus. Some dino had munched on some bad grub and dinos worldwide were now paying the price.

The Trudeausaurus had instructed the Davidbelisaurus and his mate to stay in their cave for 14 days. The dino rationale was simple. If the virus couldn’t find you, you wouldn’t get sick. Dinosaur health care had come a long way.

“14 days?” said his wife. “What are we going to do? Can I go see my mother?”

“‘Fraid not. It’s too dangerous.”

They heard voices down the path by the Spring Break Lagoon. Voices, laughter and uproarious merriment. Those damn teenage dinos, oblivious to potentially catching the virus. 

“Hey,” said Maria, “Who do they think they are?”

“They’re going to be the death of us all. Young, dumb and about as invincible as the lunch menu.”

Maria turned to him with concern in her eyes.

“Tell me again that we’re doing the right thing.”

“Sweetheart, you know we’re doing what must be done.”

“I know. I just needed to hear your voice. We’re going to be staring at these walls for awhile. Look,” she said, pointing to the cave wall before them. “The previous tenants weren’t even civilized enough to write anything on them.”

Her husband stepped forward and patted the wall for good measure.

“That will come in good time. Maybe in a million years or so. Then, perhaps there’ll be some other walnut brain to come along and lead civilization to a better place.”

“You mean like the T-Rump? I pray it doesn’t get this bad ever again.”

They fell silent, contemplating their current plight. David wrapped his short arm around his wife. He nuzzled her ear.

“Cheer up. I’ll sing you a song.”

“I don’t know. You’re always singing about the T-Rump. The T-Rump this, the T-Rump that. You know it triggers my menopause.”

“Just doing my best to fight his overwhelming penchant for revisionist history. Somebody has to get the dino story straight.”

“I know, dear.

They looked into each other’s eyes. His gaze told her he’d temper his words as best he could. And he sang …

 

I’m weary of all the headlines 

As I self isolate

I’m stayin’ in the only place

Where feelin’ good never was right wing

And this virus, we gotta break the chain 

 

Well, I’m stayin’ home

Safe in the place where I belong

And where the laughter has always been free

I’m not some crumb-bum

I’m right inside, outside is wrong

I don’t regret these four walls ‘round me

Cuz this place is, your face is solid gold

So I’m stayin’ home

Well, I’m stayin’ home

 

The lies are gettin’ longer, it seems

Corona’s not the flu

And T-Rump can’t tell us what we need to do

So who can we turn to?

And I don’t want to die

But we’re forever on stand by

 

So I’m stayin’ home

Safe in the place where I belong

And where the laughter has always been free

I’m not some crumb-bum

I’m right inside, outside is wrong

I don’t regret these four walls ‘round me

Cuz this place is, your face is solid gold

 

Don’t you dare go out that door!

Cuz you’re headed for a fall

You’re headed for a fall

It’s no time for some jaunt

Don’t you dare go out that door!

Cuz you’re headed for a fall

You’re headed for a fall

 

Oh, well I’m stayin’ home

Safe in the place where I belong

And where the laughter has always been free

I’m not some crumb-bum

I’m right inside, outside is wrong

I don’t regret these four walls ‘round me

Cuz this place is, your face is solid gold

I said this place is, your face is solid gold

So I’m stayin’ home

I’m stayin’ home

………………………………

You can hear the musical version of today’s post and previous T-Rump Digs at my podcast site at Podbean. Two new T-Rump tracks every Saturday. Enjoy. Sing along!

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